Fair England

The view from my kitchen window, overlooking the neighborhood green

I'll be honest with you--I'm a little afraid that if I don't start writing down everything I'm doing, I won't be able to remember all the wonderful things I've seen and done here. So here is a random smattering of the thoughts of an American tourist in England.

About a month ago, a friend and I went to Cambridge for a day, and I'm not quite sure how we managed to fit so many experiences into a matter of hours.  Admiring the Fitzwilliam's impressive collection, and standing awestruck in front of a few Monet works until other museum-goers were visibly annoyed with us, was only the beginning.  From there, we had tea and Chelsea buns (basically glorified cinnamon buns--but with good reason--covered in molasses and currants) and ambled along the Backs with a third friend, who told us all about graduate life at Cambridge.  We ate dinner in an out-of-the-way Indian restaurant and then attended an Epiphany carol service at St John's College Chapel. I have always been a fan of boys' choirs, but this service was particularly lovely.  Just before 6:00, the chapel went completely dark, and we waited in silence while we listened to the college's bells toll the hour.  Then the audience slowly set the chapel aglow as we each lit a small candle. Listening to the readings and music by candlelight was a real treat, though I did feel badly that I ended up dripping a good deal of wax on a prayer book... 

Cambridge in all its glory.  But my heart will always belong to Oxford over Cambridge, of course. (And Harvard above both!)

The main reason my friend and I had journeyed to Cambridge that day was to listen to our third friend sing in a choral and orchestral concert at King's College, so after the carol service finished, we made our way to King's.  On the way, we happened to bump into Stephen Hawking, which was particularly timely as we had just watched the film The Theory of Everything that week.  Clearly, he and we were both busy, but just seeing someone so famous was an added pleasure to an already exciting day.  Although I was incredibly tired, and despite the fact that I spent the two hours perched on a very cold and hard stone bench, the concert at King's was a once-in-a-lifetime experience. A long admirer of King's College Choir, I spent much of the concert trying to get over the fact that I was actually sitting in King's Chapel!!  If you haven't heard the King's College Choir sing, please do yourself a favor, and listen to this or even this if you have time and don't mind getting into the Christmas spirit in February.

Choral and Orchestral Concert in King's College Chapel, Cambridge

Two weeks later, we made our way to Oxford but with entirely different intentions; we went for a Superbowl party that an American friend was hosting.  We spent a good deal of the day hunting up American food (Can you say Domino's pizza, chicken wings, Doritos, and Sprite? I think my heart is happy that I'm in England now where it's difficult to find these horribly unhealthy things...) We planned our day so that we could attend mass at St Aloysius, which I've missed ever since that summer I studied at Oxford. Though I was horrendously tired the next day--and really the remainder of the week--it felt nice to stay up so late for once and to let my inner-American out in full force. Plus, the fact that the Patriots won made it even more worth it...

The NFL is very slowly gaining an audience over here in England...

In front of Christ Church, Oxford where I studied the summer of 2012. (Confession: this picture is actually from August; it was too cold to take pictures when we were in Oxford a few weeks ago.)

Last weekend, the sun came out, which was very exciting.  I spent all of Sunday afternoon walking through central London.  Starting at Green Park, I made my way past Buckingham Palace, through St. James's Park, up to Westminster Abbey and finally to Trafalgar Square, where I took tea and caught up on some letter-writing. This weekend, I was back in central London both Friday night and yesterday. On Friday, a couple of friends and I had the very lucky opportunity to sit in on a BBC-recorded choral and orchestral concert to be aired in April.  It was strange to see radio behind-the-scenes; the musicians had to replay several pieces in order to get them good enough to be aired.  But since the music was spectacular, I certainly wasn't complaining! Yesterday afternoon, I met some other friends for a traditional Sunday roast at a nearby pub, and we spent the rest of the day poking around the Museum of London, admiring St Paul's, and taking tea at a tea room overlooking the gorgeous cathedral.  

A horribly blurry photo snapped of the Big Ben in the rain after the concert in Central Hall Westminster on Friday evening

Traditional Sunday Roast

Lest you think that all I do is wander around England with friends, you should know that every day of the last month except those recorded above was spent teaching, applying for jobs for next year, or doing the sorts of things that no one ever talks about--cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, laundry, etc. But that's the nice thing about life, isn't it?  Just a few fun days with friends make the quiet days at home and at work a welcome blessing.  I'm a creature of routine at heart, and I'd actually far rather have a string of quiet days working or reading than a string of days out-and-about.  But at the same time, I wouldn't give up those few days out-and-about for anything.  Balance really is the key, my friends.  Until next time :)

Because my every-day life consists of cups and cups (and cups) of tea...

'He loves you so much!'

There are so very few things better than receiving a letter in the mail. When the letter is from a dear, faraway friend? Even better. When the letter ends with the reminder that 'He [God] loves you so much!'? The absolute best.

So in case you didn't receive the message today, God loves you so, so much. You're special to Him, whoever you are and whatever you believe. I think we could all stand to be reminded of that beautiful truth a little more often.

Living Today's Dreams

I splurged on this little wall decoration soon after I moved into my apartment because every time I passed it in a shop window, I thought how lovely it would be to wake up to it hanging across from my bed.  I was right :)

There is nothing--NOTHING--that I want more than to be a wife and mother.  There. I've said it.  My background, especially my time at Harvard, has made that an incredibly difficult admission to make. I do want to make a case for the stay-at-home mother, but that's for another post.  For now, I want to focus on a topic that's been on my heart lately: dreams and planning for the future.

For as long as I can remember, I've had three goals in life:

1. Attend Harvard
2. Become a teacher
3. Raise a large family

The first, by the grace of God, happened, and it was a beautiful, if at times very trying, experience. The second is well underway.  But the third is the most difficult because it is the one for which I really and truly cannot plan.

As often as I discuss with my friends the 'ideal' age to marry, the reality is that it is not a decision entirely in my own hands.  Love does follow a plan, but it's not my plan: it's God's.  It's His decision when that man, that future husband, will come into my life.  And how that relationship will unfold only God knows.  

I've been feeling increasingly frustrated over the last few months. For the first time in my life, I don't have a true confidant--a true 'kindred spirit' to use my dear friend Anne Shirley's words--close at hand.  Growing up, my parents and sister were always there whenever I needed to talk.  I shared everything with my family; they knew me like no one else.  Then I moved away from home, but instead of losing kindred spirits, I gained some.  My dear roommates became my new family, and I always had a good friend nearby for a late-night chat.  Additionally, I spent two years of college in (two) committed, long-term relationships. By graduation, I had become very accustomed to always having someone to text goodnight.  There was always someone, if not several people, who knew what I was up to everyday, and I was blessed to share the lives--the ups and downs, surprises and triumphs--of those around me.  

I'm definitely happier when I have someone else to focus on and care for.  I like writing notes of encouragement; I like texting to see how an exam or interview went; I like baking favorite treats for birthdays and celebrations and for no reason at all.  But here in London--and it's taken me a long time to realize this--I don't have all of that for the first time in my life.  

My parents and I have a five-hour time difference; my sister and I have an eight-hour difference.  I am no longer in a relationship. My good friends and former roommates are working many hours, and with the added difficulty of the time difference, our schedules rarely match up.  Don't get me wrong; I am making good friends here.  But friendships take a long time to build, especially those kindred-spirit kind.  And more than anything, I miss being able to have a heart-to-heart with someone at the end of the day.  I miss taking a deep and invested interest in other people's daily doings.  

I hesitate to write all this because I don't want you all to think I'm unhappy here.  Nothing could be further from the truth.  But while I am on this great teaching adventure, I do find myself lonely.  And it's that loneliness that has been making me long more than ever to be the wife and mother I've dreamt of for so long.  The idea of having a husband to care for and to care for me seems such a sweet image that I've often caught myself dreaming the afternoon away in those happy thoughts of the future.  But this weekend, I decided to lose myself in those dreams no more.

This--this very experience, this teaching, this city, these students--this is another one of my long-held dreams.  And to dream of tomorrow when today itself is a dream-come-true is nothing short of ungrateful, and frankly, stupid.  So I have recommitted myself to living life here to the fullest.  If it is God's will, I will be a wife and mother someday.  But for now, I am a teacher and a lucky explorer of London.  

So last weekend, I dropped everything and took a spur-of-the-moment day-trip to Cambridge with a new friend.  And yesterday, I browsed the literary treasures of the British Library, sampled a 'duffin' from a nearby tea room, and explored the marvels of ancient Egypt in the British Museum.  

Cambridge as the sun set on its breathtakingly beautiful colleges

A photo of St Pancras Station I snapped while walking from the British Library to the British Museum yesterday.

This week, I will be the best teacher I can be.  I will put everything into my work and my students.  I will explore London when I can. And more than anything, I'll pray that I never forget to live today's dream.

Adoramus Te

(It's not the best picture in the world, but I was having trouble getting a good one since there were so many people going in and out of the church.)

My parish recently held its annual 40 Hour Eucharistic Adoration, and while I was unable to sign up for a time slot, I did slip into the church Friday afternoon and spend some quiet time with our Lord. And let me tell you--there is nothing that adoration doesn't make better.

Even after a week when many of my colleagues, students, and I were ill...
Even after a week when my lessons didn't go very well...
Even after a week when my plans to see friends were thwarted...

Even after this kind of week, Christ was there to tell me it was alright.  He told me to let go and trust in Him, and the weekend has been so peaceful as a result.

Adoration
(Because whose Sunday couldn't use a little St. Thomas Aquinas and Matt Maher?)

As we start another week...

Richmond, London

"Entrust your works to the Lord, and your plans will succeed....In his mind a man plans his course, but the Lord directs his steps."

~Proverbs 16:3-9.

Friday Afternoons

The view from my window at school.
I get to look out at my church all day :)

About two months ago, I read an article about some work habits and tips from CEOs of major corporations.  And--although I'm a beginning teacher, obviously not a CEO haha--some of the tips struck me as particularly good ideas for people working at any level and any job.

The two that I've adopted wholeheartedly are related to Friday afternoon routines.  I'm not sure about you, but Friday afternoons can sometimes be a little tough for me.  Either I'm really tired from a long, but hopefully productive, week, or I'm full of energy and antsy for the weekend to begin.  Once I got into the following two habits, though, I've found that Friday afternoons are one of my favorite times of the week.


1. Cultivate a Grateful Attitude--Write a Thank You Note

I'm the sort of person who relishes any opportunity to write a hand-written note or letter anyway, so I immediately jumped at this idea.  Friday afternoon, as I'm winding down my work week and getting ready to shut down my computer, I think back over the week.  Usually, there is at least one person who has helped me somehow, even if in a very small way.  Now every Friday, I take five minutes to write a thank you card for someone at the school who has made a difference in my week, and I slip it in his or her pigeon hole on my way out.

Sometimes I thank someone for giving me the opportunity to do something interesting like chaperone a field trip or help organize an outing for the foreign exchange students.  Sometimes I thank someone for brightening my day, letting me observe a lesson, giving me ideas for my own teaching, letting me borrow teaching materials, or motivating me at lunch.  Other times, they're deeper notes to one of my mentors, telling them how grateful I am for their support as I learn how to become a better teacher. Whatever it's for and whomever it's to, that note always brightens my afternoon.  And I've found that these tiny notes have dramatically improved my relationships with my colleagues; it's incredible how much a hand-written note can mean to someone in this digital age.


2. Cultivate a Positive Attitude--Write a Reflection

After I write a thank you note, I take another five minutes to record all the positives I can think of from the past week as well as all the things I wish had gone better or I hope to improve.  For example, today I realized I hadn't made enough of an effort to watch another teacher teach this week. (I try to observe at least two lessons a week; it helps my teaching so much!)  But I also remembered that this week had a lot of positives:

• I gave a lesson without using a Powerpoint for the first time this year.  (Sadly, that was a major accomplishment.  It's so easy to get comfortable with one way of teaching and forget that there are dozens of other methods to try.)
• I improved a grammar lesson the second time I gave it that had gone rather poorly when I tried it the first time. 
• I had the chance to watch some of my students sing in the year's first chorus concert.
• And finally, I was able to turn a baking disaster into a success. I have eleven girls in my homeroom, and I have promised to bake and bring in a treat for each of their birthdays.  (It's fun for them, and it gives me a chance to bake but not eat the whole batch myself...)  But sadly, I forgot the egg when making butterscotch brownies, and they turned out more like hard candy than brownies.  However, I cut them differently and called them butter candy instead, and the girls loved them so much that they asked for the recipe. That request made me smile...

Anyway, these two habits have dynamically transformed my Fridays and always leave me in a good mood for the start of the weekend.  Do you have any Friday afternoon routines?

Life Updates

Well, I doubt I have any regular readers since I've only posted twice, and it's been a month since my last post.  But if I do, my sincere apologies for my long absence.

For awhile, I wasn't posting because it was school vacation, and I was traveling.  But then...as time went on, I started to psych myself out a little.  I was worried I didn't have anything interesting to say; then I was worried I had too much to say, and it began to feel like work.  And finally, I realized I was being silly and that I should just write what's on my mind.

It's true that there's a lot I meant to write about--on All Saints Day, I wanted to write about St. Therese of Lisieux, for whom this blog is named.  (More on that to come eventually, I promise.) Then on All Souls Day, I wanted to write about my wonderful, sweet grandmother, who just passed away this March.  But I am  determined never to let these blog posts feel like work, so I'm letting it go that I didn't get to write about everything just when I wanted to.  Instead, I'm letting my mood and current interests dictate my post, and that means that today, you're getting a lot of pictures of my travels and other adventures over school break :)

Standing outside the ruins of St. Anthony's Chapel on Arthur's Seat in Edinburgh, Scotland

View of the Old City of Edinburgh from Arthur's Seat. Any city that has natural and manmade wonders this beautiful is my kind of city!

Edinburgh, Scotland

The Nelson Monument on Calton Hill in Edinburgh on Trafalgar Day (October 21st). It commemorates Lord Nelson's victory at the Battle of Trafalgar in 1805.

Edinburgh at sunset

I absolutely fell in love with this tea room in Edinburgh called 'Clarinda's.' It felt just like afternoon tea should.

I mean, come on. How perfect??

Looking towards The Mall from St. James's Park, London

An absolute 'God moment' in Richmond, London

Some deer grazing in Richmond Park, London. Casual.

Autumn foliage in Hyde Park, London. I still miss the foliage in Boston, but Hyde Park almost gives New England a run for its money...